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Four Shades of Love At Valentine


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The Interview Magazine

64

February is the month of love, a month that the sacrificial love of St. Valentine is commemorated. But love has taken a whole new dimension from the time of the third century Catholic priest. The Interview presents the different shades of love as many have come to know it…

 

Funke Treasure Durodola

GM, FRCN Radio 1

What does love mean to you and how would you describe it?            

Love can be overwhelming; it is something you can’t fight. You fall in love when you least expect it and it may take the wind out of your sails. You might get that knight in shining armour. I believe in love, I’m a terrible romantic. Everyone must experience love at least once in their lifetime.

When you first met your husband, what trait did you see in him, the most exciting aspect of him personality, that made you want him in your life?

He was patient. I thought I might be in love with someone else but he was patient. As they say, love is patient.

How did you know that he was The One?

He didn’t let me be and he took everything I threw at him. I didn’t think that love was going to find me at that time. And, of course, he’s a tall, dark and handsome man!

What does Valentine’s Day mean to you?

Personally, I believe it’s over-hyped. All those things should be done regularly anyway. Valentine’s Day can be a day to affirm one’s love for their partner. Even married couples can show other married couples love by exchanging gifts. It doesn’t have to be a day that there’s sex o! If there’s no sex, it’s OK. Being in love is like a good high.

If your husband doesn’t give you a gift on Valentine’s Day, what would you do?
Does it matter? He gives me gifts anyway. Knowing the person I know, he will probably get me flowers, or a cake, or something. I’d rather do mine before or after the hype. He does his on that day and will always surprise me with a gift. It’s good to have someone romantic around you.

Who do you believe is the dominant one in your relationship and why?
I think it’s my husband. He also shows more affection; I am less showy.

What is the one thing that your husband does that drives you crazy?
Hmm, what would that be? He’s refused to go on vacation at the same time as me. It doesn’t drive me crazy but I just wonder: wouldn’t it be nice for us to go on vacation together?

What is the one thing that would be a relationship breaker for you?
Most times it’s not the big things and it’s not always about infidelity. Most times, it’s the small things that add up. For example, not having children after a long time can test endurance and love.

Which love song would you pick to serenade your husband?
‘Thinking Out Loud’ by Ed Sheeran. I love that song.

Which movie title best describes your relationship?
Hubby is the movie person. I can’t even remember the titles of the movies that I do watch. Well, this does not describe us per se but I like movies with Jennifer Lopez in it - The Wedding Planner. I like feel-good movies; any J-Lo movie works for me.

 

Lolu Akinwunmi, frpa

Group CEO, Prima Garnet Africa

What does love mean to you and how would you describe it?

Love is about passionate affection, being profoundly tender, with and about a person, and in this case, the opposite sex. It’s a feeling of warm, personal attachment and deep affection. Sometimes it manifests in sexual passion or desire.

When you first met your wife, what trait did you see in her, the most exciting aspect of him personality, that made you want her in your life?

We met at an event, and so it wasn’t about character first. It was physical. I saw a tall and beautiful person. I have always been attracted to tall people. Even from distance and when we were introduced, I saw a very gentle person with an easy personality. Over time and as we dated and spent time together, I saw in her a lot of caring attitude, selflessness, honesty, godliness and seriousness.

How did you know that she was The One?

Both of us were serious Christians and we prayed together. We both knew by the leading of the Holy Spirit that we were right for each other.

What does Valentine’s Day mean to you?

I know in a specific sense that the day is supposed to be a special one for lovers and for the expression of love and affection. However, over time, it has been abused and bastardised and has lost these values. So, it means nothing to me actually. I believe that, mentally and emotionally, I have risen above this level of expression. I love my wife every time, and express it all the time. I therefore don’t have any need for a separate day for this.

If your wife does not give you a gift on Valentine’s Day, what would you do?

She will not because we don’t have the tradition, and I will not expect any. We have no issues with this at all.

Who do you believe is the dominant one in your relationship and why?

None. I am the head of the family and she plays a very strong supportive role. No one dominates anybody. Domination is negative.

What is the one thing your wife does that drives you crazy?

Nothing drives me crazy. Of course, as a human, she must sometimes do some things I don’t like, and I suppose it’s the same with her. But you have to understand that there are reasons why we do some of the things we do. Has she had a bad day at work, etc.? As long as I do not see or perceive malice, I can live with it as we discuss and resolve such issues.

What is the one thing that would be a relationship breaker for you?

Can’t think of anything at this point. I don’t want to be hypothetical or academic, so I take that question to mean what she would do to be a relationship breaker between us. We have stayed together for so long that I know what she would not do. We met in 1984 and got married in 1989.

Which love song would you pick to serenade your wife?

I love Lionel Richie’s ‘Hello’, and she knows I do. Indeed she knows I am a big fan of the artiste.

Which movie title best describes your relationship?

I am afraid I hardly watch movies; I rather read a lot. One of the challenges I have with movies is I have to wait till the end to know how it ends. With a book, I simply go to the last chapters. I sometimes sleep at movies!

 

Tasos Amanatidis

Director of Operations at Leventis Food

What does love mean to you and how would you describe it?            

At this age and after 18 years of marriage, love means family, respect, solidarity, friendship, accountability and truthfulness

When you first met your wife, what trait did you see in her, the most exciting aspect of him personality, that made you want her in your life?

Apart from the beauty (that is always a motivation), it was the instinct that, somehow, after so many, she was the one.

How did you know that she was The One?

I trusted my instinct that she will never let me down in any way, and she never did..

What does Valentine’s Day mean to you?

Absolutely nothing.

If your wife doesn’t give you a gift on Valentine ’s Day, what would you do?

If she does, or on other hand I do, then it means we have something on the side.

Who do you believe is the dominant one in your relationship and why?

She is, since she’s the weaker one and I’m the accommodating one. In most cases, if she does not want something to happen, it does not. But both parties have a small freedom to do some small things for themselves. In family matters, the decision in major things is common.

What is the one thing that your wife does that drives you crazy?

Panics and worries deeply over the most ridiculous things and 100 different ones that usually never happen. Also she is the definition of pessimism whilst I am the opposite.

What is the one thing that would be a relationship breaker for you?

Infidelity.

Which love song would you pick to serenade your wife?

A Greek one that would be Chinese to you, but it’s not in English; the song is ‘Amor from Nino’ (Spanish).

Which movie title best describes your relationship?

The Notebook

 

Teju Babyface

TV presenter, comedian

What does love mean to you and how would you describe it?          Love, as I see it, changes from stage to stage. Love is what you feel when you get the first butterflies in your stomach. Some may call it infatuation but that’s all semantics. You must feel those butterflies; otherwise you will not be drawn or attracted to the person in the first place. The thing, however, is that true love doesn’t always remain in that form all the time. It keeps developing and changing, so that it becomes a decision, too, after a while.  A decision? Yes, like the decision to remain faithful and married to the same person despite all their annoying quirks and shortcomings (and vice-versa). I could go on and on but I think you get the point? If you don’t, grab a Bible and read 1 Corinthians 13. Mr. Paul does a stellar job of describing love in that to me.

When you first met your wife, what trait did you see in her, the most exciting aspect of him personality,that made you want her in your life?

Well, I thought she was very attractive and built the way I like women built. There used to be an English word for referring to good-looking women; handsome. You hardly hear that anymore but that was what I thought about her. I thought she was built handsomely. So that was the initial attraction. That soon fades if the content is not as good as the container, though and fortunately for me, she was better looking on the inside than the outside (if you get what I mean). If I had to pick one singular distinguishing trait, it would be that she’s not clingy or emotionally dependent, always looking for affirmation. I can’t stand that!

How did you know that she was The One?

She stooped to conquer! From the foregoing, you can deduce that I was attracted to a certain kind of pulchritude in women, the good-looking type. The thing is that most women who fit this description think the world of themselves - and you can’t blame them. Most of them were prom queens or the most popular girl in school, so they come with a very high and often inflated sense of self-worth, which means they will usually not be docile enough to, in the words of the bible, submit to their prospective husbands. Look, nobody wants (or needs) their wife to be a doormat or pushover; God forbid! but only one of us can be head, and the other the support. My wife was humble enough to submit throughout the period we dated. Whenever it came to it, she always deferred to me in terms of final decision without much fuss. It was a very refreshing thing indeed. Fortunately, she still does!

What does Valentine’s Day mean to you?

A very expensive day with pressures fa! I pity the broke man whose wife puts a lot of store in the significance of Val’s Day. Mine doesn’t; yet again, another reason why we are married. 

If your wife doesn’t give you a gift on Valentine’s Day, what would you do?

Nothing really. Like I said, it’s just another day of social conventions. It doesn’t bother me one way or the other. As a matter of fact, I am most sentimental about my birthday.

Who do you believe is the dominant one in your relationship and why?

There is no permanent dominance in our relationship. Ours is a dynamic union, which means there are areas in which I am dominant and vice versa. Sometimes I yield and give in to her, and she does the same for me. Isn’t that how this is supposed to work? Why get married if it must always be your way or the highway?

What is the one thing that your wife does that drives you crazy?

She doesn’t return things to where she took them from in the first place - remote controls, phones, combs, perfumes, car keys, etc. Arrrrgh! (Don’t ask her about mine. I know the list is longer)

What is the one thing that would be a relationship breaker for you?

Relationship breaker ke? Weren’t you at my wedding where I repeated the ‘for better for worse’ part after the priest? We’re in this for the permanent haul. No breakers anywhere.

Which love song would you pick to serenade your wife?

My wife? Who knows, these days? It used to be Timi Dakolo’s ‘Iyawo Mi’ - which we were fortunate enough to have him sing at our wedding.

Which movie title best describes your relationship?

A Wonderful Life!


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