January 22, 2016      01:00

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'Living By Water, Dying Of Thirst’


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The Interview Magazine

83

The phrase above is a line taken from a popular song by American country music idol, Don Williams. In that number, he muses about the inscrutable logic of fate that, for instance, makes someone dwelling close to a river find that he/she is reduced a life of thirst. Old Williams' words certainly ring true for the state situated between two famous rivers in Nigeria.

Still can’t guess which?

The one whose flying gomina now has his days numbered, having been beaten soundly by the opposition recently. Long before the last elections were held, his Excellency had had to deal with a personal sense of shame. It was one of those lousy courtesy calls, where the state chief executive plays the peacock while the resident Master of Ceremonies praises him to high heaven as being the best thing to have happened to the state after God's Creation Day, before visitors who have to nod more out of courtesy than conviction. That fateful day, among other things, the MC had boasted that his master had provided water for everyone in the state, such that the water-borne diseases once prevalent there had now become a thing of the past. But soon, one of the guests seated in the executive conference had to use the rest room. After using the convenience, he opened the tap and was greeted only by the gurgling sound of nothing. In desperation, he moved to two more adjoining conveniences. Same story. Following his complaint to one of the governor's aides, a bottle of water had to be procured for the poor visitor to wash his hands.

Eventually, word reached the gomina about what had happened. But that was long after all the guests had left. Too bad he did not have the chance to give the excuse that it was actually due to some "technical fault". What a shame that taps in the governor's office in a state hemmed by two famous rivers were not running.

 


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